Dear Me,
Let me just start by saying, you’re not going to die an old woman and never having been kissed. I know that was on your mind a lot.
*Stop being so tough. It’s ok for people to see the soft, vulnerable side of us. Yea, you probably will get hurt more that way, but people might like you better knowing that you probably aren’t going to kick the crap out of them.
*Stop being everyone else’s matchmaker and bodyguard. Worry about yourself. If people are making mistakes in their lives, tell them, don’t try and protect them from the consequences. And for GOODNESS SAKE: STOP TRYING TO HOOK YOUR FRIENDS UP WITH THE GUYS YOU LIKE!
*That plan to never get married or have kids, to move to California and become a Photojournalist. It’s a great dream. But God has something better up His sleeves.
*Stop wasting so much time on trying to get guys to notice you. Stop wasting so much time on the guys who do notice you but treat you like garbage. (Oh, and that one guy we crushed on for YEARS, he’s nowhere near as cute anymore.)
*Give your parents a break. They have no idea what they’re doing and they still have 2 more kids to raise.
*Stop giving in to our sister: You’re not doing her any favors by cutting her so much slack. Oma’s right: You’re spoiling her. Our brother: Protect him. Yea he’s a pain in the butt, yea it’s hard being a senior and being know as “Beckmann’s sister”, but someday you’ll wish you had a relationship with him .
*You’re going to lose a lot of people that you love (Oma, Opa, Mama), it’s going to suck, you’re going to miss them, but the pain will slowly get more bearable. You’ll still start crying at the thought of them sometimes; the holidays and all those big moments will be the hardest.
*Put yourself out there. You did it once, in the high school musical (Music Man) and look what happened…you got to be on center stage AND do your Irish accent. You’re going to miss out on so much (and regret it) if you don’t.
*Don’t stop writing. Ever. Or painting.
*Those parties that you were mad about not going to (even though you never even bothered to ask your parents if you could go) they weren’t worth it anyways. Who wants to sit around and watch a bunch of dumb people getting drunk and doing stupid things.
*That body of your’s, the one you are so tough on, because it isn’t as skinny as everyone else’s: You’re really, REALLY going to miss it some day.
*Don’t keep trying to smoosh yourself into everyone else’s mold. You’re not them, you’re you and there is so much that you have to offer. And when you’re not fitting in their mold, don’t take the crap they’re going to dish out on you. Just hold your head high and carry on.
*College: Just stay at Oneonta. There’s no point in transferring a bazillion times, because you’re going to end up back there anyways (even if you did manage to graduate in 7 semesters).
I can’t tell you to do anything different than what you already are, because it was all those things that got you to where you are today. Yea, there’s pain. No, you’re not still friends with most of those people.
Oh, yea, that kiss you were so worried about? It’s going to be great, and so are all the others you’re going to have: You’re going to end up married to that guy with a crazier-happier life than you could ever imagine. God had your back the entire time. All of that worrying and tears about not having a boyfriend? Totally wasted.
Louisa May had it right: “You don’t need scores of suitors. You need only one…if he’s the right one.” {Oh, let mom go with you to see Little Women in the theaters…because 18 years later, you’re still going to regret not having let her go see it with you.}
Love,
You {at 30}
What would you tell your teenage self?
Linking up with Emily at Chatting at the Sky for her new book release, Graceful.
